Bubba the Gator has terrible headaches. He goes to numerous doctors seeking their advice, but no one can find the solution. He even sees renowned experts, but with no luck. Finally he finds a specialist right at UF Health Shands Hospital in Gainesville. After an examination, the doctor says to him, "I have good news for you and bad news. The good news is I am almost 100% positive that I know where your headache pain comes from. The bad news is that it comes from your groin area - specifically your testicles - and the only way to stop this pain is to have your testicles removed."

Bubba hears this news with alarm, and his reply is, "No way!"

But the pain is unrelenting and soon he finds himself back at Shands.

He asks the doctor, "Are you positive in your diagnosis?"

The doctor says, yes, but he willingly takes another look at the Bubba, and all the test results come back with the same answer. The doctor says, "I am more convinced now than ever that I am correct."

So Bubba goes back to the Surgery Center at Shands and the procedure is performed. Bubba wakes up anguishing about his loss of manhood but wonderfully pain free for the first time in years. He feels like a new man. He decides that, being a new man, he will begin by buying his first suit - ever - plus the related clothing at a famous men's store in Tallahassee. Bubba makes the drive, finds the store, goes inside, and tells one of the associates that he wants new clothes top to bottom, and the associate – sizing up Bubba’s bib overalls - agrees completely and says he will be as much help as possible.

The man says, "Then let's get started," and he says, "We will begin with your dress shirt."

Bubba says, "Okay, my shirt size is . . . "

"Wait," says the associate, "I have been fitting clothes for 35 years and I'm very good job at judging sizes. For example, you need a shirt size 16˝ neck and 33 sleeves."

Bubba says that's exactly right and they quickly find him the shirt he needs. Then they go on to pants, and the associate says, "You have a 38 waist and an inseam of 30."

"You done good!" says Bubba, and the associate quickly finds Bubba the pants he needs.

The associate then says, "What direction you want to go next, sport coat and tie or underwear?"

Bubba selects underwear and the associate says, "No problem." He says, "For a tee shirt you have a chest size of 39 so that means you take a Medium tee shirt."

"Super," says Bubba.

So the associate continues, "And for your jockey shorts, your 38" waist size means you will take size Large briefs."

Bubba interrupts. "You missed it! I take size Medium briefs."

The associate pauses for a minute and then says, "No, you need size Large Jockey shorts because if you were to wear size Medium Jockey shorts they would constrain your testicles and that would give you massive headaches."